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December 5, 2011
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Shanty Tunnel by ModalMechanica Shanty Tunnel by ModalMechanica
I want this to be donee, but It can definitely use some good input before then. This is for my final at CDC so please help me out!!

-Edit-

Added in some of your guy's critique. See some of the process layout and more on my new account:
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:iconhongablaster:
This is a very nice piece of artwork. It has character and allows for a lot of speculation about the rest of the world the scene is taking place in. I'll break down my critique to pros & cons:

PROS:

- The pallette: I liked the colours in this one. I truly like pastel-like colours, not very bright but not too gloomy either. This one gets the balance right.
- The situation: I always like pictures showing warriors relaxing, tinkering or otherwise doing things that usually happen between the stints of fighting. It makes one imagine what their situation is, what they are dealing with and what their chances of winning/surviving are.
- The mech design: This mech is awesome. It has inspired design. It has lots of dynamism, and has the right blend of realism and fiction - I don't like too "fictional" over-the-top mech designs.


CONS (read this as "points of possible improvement"):

-The main theme (the mech) is a bit too far and looks small. I think that if the "camera" was a little closer to it, the design would appear more impressive and we would be in place to take a better look of the man on it. I understand it might be impossible to remedy now, but the fisrt feeling of looking at this pic was "I wish I could move closer".
-It feels like the picture, especially the items in the foreground on the left could make use of a bit more detail or better shape definition. Detail might not make a lot of sense when you count the amount of time it takes to create, especially when it is not on the main piece of interest on the picture but eventually creates a feeling of quality and completeness and that in turn makes it worth it.
- The light through the holes on the concrete slab above the mech is a bit too bright. Since you have a visible sky, then every light source that produces less light than that should appear darker. So the holes themselves should remain white as they are but the streaks of light falling down should be a bit darker (allow the concrete behind them to show more).

That's it from me, it's a very good piece and I wish you luck with the results of your examination!
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
8 out of 8 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconjjpeabody:
Overall, nice atmosphere. Your impact is weak, but composition is well thought out. I love the scene, but your depth is off in your image and so it throws everything else off.

The shadows in front need to be darker than the shadows beyond. You got that going on in the WAY back of this, but you don't in the front. Make them darker. It should be a gradient of shadow from the front to the back getting lighter as it goes away from you.

Also, Enlarge that Mech. The red sleeping thing on the right is bigger. Make it impressive and barely fit into that place. Do the cable lines have to be there? Is that part of the story? You are doing a Half Shadow on your mech which is something a little different, but very effective. I've never tried this myself, but it adds a lot of drama to your image. The mech is in a perfect location for that half-shadow so use it :)

Make the darks on your mech lighter. They're darker than the foreground shadow and that's what's throwing off the depth in your image. Right now it looks like it's fake and just copy and pasted there.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
6 out of 6 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

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:iconcatalanomedia:
CatalanoMedia Apr 30, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
I prefer this one. Having the mech pushed back gives a better illusion of depth.
The other one feels kinda flat to me.
Reply
:iconmrkirby2:
Mrkirby2 Jan 16, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
They look like guerrilla fighters in their secret base >_>

...

>=)
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:icondasadam:
hey mate!
..this might be waaaaaaaaay to late but i did paint over to try out some solutions
basically i cropped off much of your image and pushed the element of interest (MECH) more to the foreground :)
[link]

anyways im a faggot for not coming back to you earlier :P my bad

regards
adam
Reply
:iconmodalmechanica:
Wow are you kidding? This is amazing and SO helpful! I'm going to implement this for sure!
Reply
:icondasadam:
really!? so there really is time left before you have to send this piece in? i thought this soup is cold about now
im glad i could help ,mate :)
Reply
:iconmodalmechanica:
Yeah, I have until February 1st before my art center portfolio is due. So I still have a bit of time. Thanks as always man.
Reply
:icondasadam:
great!
my pleasure mate!
Reply
:icongrimmdev:
Grimmdev Jan 13, 2012  Professional Interface Designer
really really good work, i couldnt complain honestly.
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